Kanwal

Life isn't treating us well...ah but then I should be used to it by now!

Watching Subha grow everyday makes me realize that she is THE best thing ever happened to me...

 And I am pretty sure It will be THE best thing, always.

I am tired, yes very tired. I don't know why because life is not as hard as before. maybe its just me going back to my old self and you know what I have been to this happy-go-lucky world... doesn't work for me atleast. I just don't have the nerve for it..or do you even need a nerve for that? 

Sometimes you can never find yourself...I am going through those sometimes...
I am tired,
I am lost,
I am sad...
and want to vanish somewhere, away from everything.

My mind is full of negative thoughts and for a change, I don't even want to share them. Stay away from me!!!

I don't know how I forgot to mention it was Subha's Birthday on the 2nd of October. I don't know how the time flew from when I first held her in my arms, she was all pink and crying, sleepy and scented with some natural fragrance, so dependent on me, till now when she has proper conversations with me, hugs and kisses me and when sees me upset, she comes and consoles me saying," mama, you'll be alright!".

She is a big girl now, but then she is only 4.

She is the best thing ever happened to me.

Sometimes things just fall into their places by themselves...I feel it is happening to my life but I don't want to put my hopes too high, because I always fall right on my face....

and it hurts!

I am aging but my life has stopped. It needs a push start but it seems my push is not strong enough for it to start again.

Happy Independence day, Pakistan!